


*shrug*

by Protecting_Stars



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human/Troll Society (Homestuck), Alternate Universe - No Sburb/Sgrub Sessions, Angst with a Happy Ending, Because crackships, Breakups, But i only wrote it that way for the plot, Characters are probably really ooc, Fluff and Angst, I cant write in character very well, M/M, Ok back to our previously scheduled tags, Poor Karkat, it is a very bad idea to start macking on your exs brother one week after you break up, listen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-12
Updated: 2017-06-09
Packaged: 2018-09-08 00:21:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8822185
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Protecting_Stars/pseuds/Protecting_Stars
Summary: I gQt bQred, went intQ GQQgle DQcs, and spit this shit Qut. Its Dirkat. Thats all there really is tQ say Qn the matter.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> *claps hands* shitty dirkkat fic is a gQ  
> I shQuld be asleep  
> Fuck that  
> Time tQ write sQme real shit

Karkat flinched as the door slammed behind his (now ex) matesprite. It had started as a small argument, then something snapped and it turned more disastrous than any previous arguments they had ever had. Why didn’t he see it coming? He could feel the tension in their relationship for a while now, so why did this hurt so much? Maybe it was from how much he was denying the inevitable breakup. It still hurt. He didn’t even notice when he started to cry, he just felt numb. _I’ll just… lay down for a bit, maybe I’ll get over it quickly and just continue without him._  Karkat walked to the bedroom and closed the door behind him, locking it so nobody comes to look for him. Finally he climbed into the bed and dragged the covers over his head. It still smelled like Dave. _I’ll lay here for however long it takes to forget him._ Karkat thought.

***

\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] has started trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]! --

GA: Karkat Are You There

GA: It Has Been A Few Days Since Anybody Last Saw You

GA: I Understand How Much This Must Hurt

GA: But It Is Not Healthy To Just Lock Yourself Away

GA: Karkat Please Respond Soon

GA: We Are All Very Worried

\-- grimAuxariliatrix [GA] has ceased trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]! --

***

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] has started trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]! --

GC: K4RK4T, YOU C4NT LOCK YOURS3LF 1N TH3R3 FOR3V3R!

GC: W3 W4NT TO H3LP YOU BUT 1F YOUR3 R3FUS1NG TO 3V3N COME OUT, TH3R3 R34LLY 1SNT 4 LOT W3 C4N DO.

GC: PL34S3 COM3 OUT.

\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] has blocked gallowsCalibrator [GC]! --

GC: >:[

\-- gallowsCalibrator’s [GC] message was not received! --

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] has ceased trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]! --

***

\-- ectoBiologist [EB] has started pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG]! --

EB: karkat, come on! you have to talk to us! we’re going to keep texting you til you you answer!

\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] has blocked ectoBiologist [EB]! --

EB: seriously?

\-- ectoBiologist’s [EB] message was not received! --

\-- ectoBiologist [EB] has ceased pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG]! --

***

Karkat angrily got up from under the blankets and stumbled to his beeping husktop. Couldn’t they just leave him alone? He watched more messages appear on the screen as he moved the mouse to click the ‘Shutdown’ button, but stopped when he saw a blinking orange name among the rainbow of colors flashing on the screen. He wasn’t sure why it caught his attention, but it just made him hesitate. Without even realizing it, Karkat clicked on the blinking name on his screen.

\-- timaeusTestified [TT] has started pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG]! --

TT: Getting straight to the point, everybody is worried about you, get your ass out of your room and socialize. You’ll get over it.

TT: Everybody has at least once, and if not, then they’ll meet the inevitable fate of one ending relationship.

TT: C’mon man, you can’t stay secluded away for the rest of your life.

CG: FUCKING WATCH ME.

TT: Well, it seems like the mythical “Karkat Vantas” is real after all.

TT: So you coming out now or what?

CG: NO, I’LL STAY HERE FOR THE REST OF MY PATHETIC LIFE. NOW CAN YOU ALL JUST LEAVE ME ALONE? 

CG: PLEASE… 

TT: Yeah sure, we’ll all just sit here and wait for you to decompose because that is exactly what we want to happen to one of our friends.

CG: WHEN WERE YOU AND I EVER “FRIENDS”? I ONLY RECALL A FEW BRIEF WORDS BETWEEN US, SO WHY THE HELL DO YOU CARE?

TT: Because I can. My question is why did you answer my messages but ignore everbody else? Seems pretty unusual to me.

CG: FUCK OFF YOU ABSOLUTE BULGELICKING ASSBAG.

TT: I’ll fuck off for a little bit.

TT: But you can expect to hear from me later.

TT: And Kanaya. I’ll be sure to bring her along.

CG: WAIT, “BRING HER ALONG”?

TT: See you soon, Nubs.

\-- timaeusTestified [TT] has ceased pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG]! --


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *dabs* IM ALIVE and also dropping my quirk because my phone takes about 5 seconds to decide "oh i have to capitalize this letter" so yea, and im too lazy to go back and change all the "Q"s to "o"s

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Im so sorry this chapter took forever to come out, ive just had SERIOUS writers block, along with bouts of Mental Illnesses (TM). I hoping to update both my dirkkat fanfics and maybe start rewriting OCTMTAB which i might change the title of, or ill just say "One Chance" because it just rolls off the tongue easier. Anyways, heres to the ship that doesnt have nearly enough fancontent!

Dirk looks up from his computer when he hears the door slam and he sees Dave walk to his room. He seemed angry. Probably another fight with Karkat, most likely about Dave needing to respect troll culture a bit more (like always). They usually make up within a day though, so Dirk doesn’t think much of it. He doesn’t even question when Dave refuses to come out of his room or answer his messages when he won’t answer the door. Dirk only starts to question it when Dave comes out of his room the next day and  _ doesn’t attempt to text or call Karkat _ . _ At all _ .

Dirk raised an eyebrow at Dave when he sat down in front of the TV to watch whatever interested him.

“Well?” Dirk asked. Dave didn’t look at him. “Have you made up with Karkat yet?” He doesn’t expect Dave to flinch when he said Karkats name.

“No, we didn’t make up, and we’re not going to this time. I’m just tired of his shit, the constant yelling and bickering, how he never shuts up about me not being ‘culturally sensitive’ enough around him! Did he ever stop to think for just a fucking  _ second _ that I was trying my best to respect his kind? But I guess it’s just too damn hard for him to listen to me say ‘matespit' or ‘kissasistertude' when he goes on and on about how fucking  _ shitty  _ and  _ weak _ and  _ inferior  _ humans are  _ all the fucking time  _ and the shithead doesn’t even  _ care  _ that he’s being just a  _ little bit  _ of a  _ GIANT FUCKING ASSHOLE. _ ” Dave is practically yelling at the end and his hands are curled into shaking fists. He takes a deep breath and stands up.

“The point is, we’re done.” He huffs and turns to walk to his room.

“So you’re just giving up on him? How long have you even thought that way about him?” Dirk asked. Dave shook his head and sighed.

“Seven months I think. It was a pretty unsteady relationship, the spark just went away.” When Dirk doesn’t respond, he turns and walks away to his room.

_ Well, _ Dirk thought.  _ Guess it’s time to tell Kanaya about what happened. _

 

***

 

\-- timaeusTestified  [TT] has started pestering grimAuxiliatrix [GA]! --

TT: So.

TT: It appears that my ectobiological brother and your son-figure have broken up.

TT: And it really doesn’t look like they’re going to get back together.

TT: So to avoid any major depressive episodes that may hit either of them, what can we do to help them?

GA: Oh Dear.

GA: I Do Not Know Exactly How To Help Them.

GA: But I Think We Should Let Them Calm Down A Little.

GA: It Has Only Been Less Than A Day.

TT: Here are the facts: Karkat is in a state of constant “anger” which is really a cover to hide how much he cares for people, and he is pretty emotional at the smallest things.

TT: Dave is constantly in a state of “coolkid extraordinaire” which is really a cover to hide 13 years of physical and mental abuse.

TT: Karkat is angry at Dave for “not respecting troll culture” and Dave is angry at Karkat for being mad at him about “not respecting troll culture”.

TT: The question is: who will we try to comfort or help first?

GA: Well

GA: I Know That Rose Left Earlier To “Attend to something extremely imperative” And She Did Not Say What, But I Assume She Went To Talk To Dave.

TT: That means we have to attempt to comfort Karkat.

TT: So when are we going to haul ass over there and get his life back on track?

GA: I Am Able To Go Right Now 

TT: Same here, so we’re going to do this right this moment?

GA: I Am Under That Assumption

TT: Alright, I’ll come get you and we’ll drive over there. See you in a minute.

\-- timaeusTestified [TT] has ceased pestering grimAuxariliatrix [GA]! --

**Author's Note:**

> *SHRUG* mQre chapters to cQme if anybQdy wants them?


End file.
